#4 Evaluating Intercultural Behavior
During my one month stay in Taiwan over the December vacation, I met several locals and there was an incident that left me quite culturally shocked.
I had met an acquaintance for the first time and I realised he was speaking to me in Chinese slowly,using hand gestures to emphasize his words. He even tried to communicate with me in halting English as the conversation wore on, as if I was unable to comprehend what he was trying to say. It puzzled me as to why he was acting in this manner because he was speaking fluently to his fellow Taiwanese and I had perfectly no problem following the conversation as I was fluent in the Chinese language.
So I asked him why he kept acting in this manner and his answer was: "I thought Singaporeans only knew how to speak English and I was afraid you would have trouble understanding me." And when I started asking the other Taiwanese if they thought Singaporeans only knew how to speak English, they nodded in agreement because we hardly used Chinese language as a medium to communicate.
This incident made me realise that different cultures really view each other differently. Even though we were all Chinese, the Taiwanese thought we could not understand Chinese because of the way we portrayed ourselves to the world, using English as our main language medium. I believe that if they had been aware that Singapore was a multi-racial country, they would have known that I was fully capable of speaking and understanding the Chinese language.
In a nutshell, we really should not be ignorant of other cultures and form our own opinions about others. It is important that we become socially aware of the different cultures around the world as Singapore becomes a globalised country.
posted by Paula @ 04:58
10 Comments
10 Comments:
Hey Paula! same here! I have a chinese TA who mistaken I do not have a Chinese name and I am not a chinese, my race is Singaporean. I agree on your last paragraph. This is because people tend to form opinions about others based on hearsay and gossips, from there they will formulate their preperceptions of them. Haha... I used to do that. HEEHEE.. But now, I am more rationale. I think to truly understand people of another culture, it is to have an open heart and mind when interacting with them.
Paula! I really agree with your last paragraph! =) it’s so true! We always live in our own private bubbles that we’re so unaware of our surroundings! Not totally our fault because we probably do not have the time or money to travel and see the world with our own eyes, so we tend to create our own beliefs of other people based on the opinions we hear from people who have really met them. And this is rather skewed because the people they met most probably didn’t represent the entire demographic of the society they’ve been in. So I guess we must really be careful when hearing/speaking sweeping statements like ‘This bunch of people is ALL like that’ or ‘Singaporeans are really so and so’.
I think this really reminds me the part which Brad spoke about similarities being the main idea that holds a group of people together. We tend to associate with people similar to us, so people also tend to associate similar people as a group. We share the common identity as Singaporeans, which makes people think that as long as you’re Singaporean, you should react like this, because your fellow Singaporean also reacts this way.
Thanks Paula for raising that important point in your last paragraph! =)
Hey Paula,
Nice post, I like it! However Paula, how do you suppose we become aware of every single culture in this world if we aren't even a half-bred anthropologist??!!?? Besides, we as imperfect human beings cannot be all-knowing, isn't so??
Rather than thinking the Taiwanese dude was being ignorant of your Singapore culture, why can't you think that he was being sensitive and cautious about your Singapore culture? Why can't you think that perhaps that his demeanour was considerate and polite and courteous and very culturally respectful???!! He was dissing you or your Singapore culture, did he? For that would surely be culturally insensitive and calamitous. Rather, Paula, he demonstrated the best sincerity and thought for your Singapore culture, which though was misinterpreted by him, would have rather erred on the safe and sensitive side than not. In short, he would rather go through the pains of gesturing and syncing than to assume the best of your culture and risk repulsive arrogannce!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Paula, you should have seen through all the beauty and delicacy of his soul/spirit/mind/psyche and be attracted to those!!!!! You shouldn't have been questioning his sanity and credibility; instead you have unknowingly surrendered yours in the process of the interaction!!!!!!!
Having said these things Paula, you contain some of the most widely accepted truths concerning culture; that we take the effort to be as privy as we can about diversity. But like I said in the first paragraph above, Paula, there is a limit to the amount of knowledge you can accomodate in your mind, and even if you had all the knowledge you would lose the knowledge over time due to lack of continual exposure and stimulation of the knowledge so kept. Instead Paula, rather than blindly memorizing or becoming aware of every single cultural trait across a thousand cultures in the world, we should simply identify the fundamental universal principles across all cultures and behave according to the way these principles will be effective for. What do I mean Paula, let me break it down for you!!!
When you study chemistry Paula, or Physics, is it more effective to master the fundamental princples of physical and chemical formulas and laws, or all the various types of questions that may be asked of these??!!??!! You don't master Physics nor Chemistry blindly memorizing every single question you have ever done in your practice, while overlooking the key principles and laws formularized, isn't so???!!?!! Rather Paula, the best Physics or Chemistry student need no practice of questions if he had completely understood the governing laws of physics and chemistry, and therefore knows how to apply them in any question thrown at him!!!
Similarly Paula, you want not to be completely aware of every single cultural knowledge; rather you want to be aware of something else different. That is the fundamental principles that governs all cultures; values such as sensitivity, respect, honor, dignity, love, care, patience, integrity, discipline, love for life, understanding, concern, justice, courage, moderation or whatever is. So Paula, all you need to do is master these virtues and become aware of them so that when you step into new cultures, you are exonerated of all crime and faults when you yourself have applied them excellently.
In short, Paula, everybody WILL LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!
Cheers
Que maravillosa!
Apologies in the 2nd paragraph one of the sentences should read this:
"He wasn't dissing you or your Singapore culture, did he? "
Lo siento
Cheers
Hey Paula!
I guess in the absence of contradicting data many people will simply assume that any stereotypes they hold are valid. One of the more unfortunate facts of life.
So that leaves you with two choices. You could educate him or you could just leave him be. Ideally we should all strive to do the former but sometimes the latter is a lot easier to accomplish.
Well there is a third option. I met this Swedish guy once and he was really annoying me with all his assumptions he already made of me because I am Singaporean and I am an engineer. So I asked him, "you are Swedish, you like to shop at IKEA is it?"
He never talked to me again.
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This is an interesting anecdote, Paula. You describe it clearly and concisely, and in fine detail. Indeed, although the players in this scenario were all "Chinese," there were clear misconceptions being revealed about what being different types of Chinese meant.
I have a question about one of your statements. You write as follows: "I believe that if they had been aware that Singapore was a multi-racial country, they would have known that I was fully capable of speaking and understanding the Chinese language."
Really? But don't you think that your hosts' perception of Singapore as being a former British colony, and thus multiracial and not JUST Chinese, is precisely why they questioned your Chineseness?
What do you think?
Thanks Paula for sharing your experience. The Taiwanese had preconceptions of Singaporeans and this as a result affected the way he communicated with you. A lesson I have learnt from your post is that in order to communicate successfully, we should try not to stereotype others but to keep an open mind. Observing others before speaking would help.
This reminds me of my experience in the states where my American classmates spoke to me in English slowly, thinking that I could not fully understand them being a Chinese. Initially, I felt really insulted but I learned to be more empathetic when I took a step back and look at the situation in a broader scope. I realized than that this misunderstanding was a mere result of cultural differences and ignorance. Inter-cultural conflict happens often but we should learn to be understanding and to not overreact in such situations. That is where EQ comes in handy.
Thanks for your post. Cheers!
Hi Paula!
This was an interesting read. I have a friend who's currently at Taiwan, and he's been there for a year since he migrated. He did tell me that most of his Taiwanese friends were shocked that he could speak Chiense well. By the way, he speaks really fluent Chinese.
So I guess that it's true that it's important to understand different cultures more, and even if you don't, it's important to approach different cultures with open minds!
Adeline: Yes,I agree that we all have our own prejudices against different culture groups. But ultimately we just really have to be more socially aware of such issues to prevent any misunderstandings.
Jac: I agree with what you said about the 'private bubble'. I think that many a times Singaporeans tend to stereotype and this is really not a good sign for us as a country. Hence, I think it is important that we actually be more open-minded to these so called 'ideas'.
Mark: I wasn't trying to point out that we should be aware of every culture in the world but instead given that we all live on the same continent Asia, I'd this belief that the Taiwanese would know that we are perfectly capable of speaking fluent,if not proper,Chinese. Furthermore, we are of the same race and I was just culturally shocked that they weren't aware that we are capable of being bilingual even though our main medium of communication is in English. Hope this clarifies :)
Faizal: Haha, I think the Swedish was really offended about the IKEA remark. Yeah, I agree that many people are really not aware of the different cultures. Take for instance our American counterparts. I read in a magazine interview that many couldn't tell the difference between a Chinese, Korean or Japanese and that Asians eat rice everyday. I just couldn't understand why they weren't able to tell the difference but I guess from their perspective, as long as you have black hair and is yellow skinned, you are Asian.
Brad: Hmmm, I would disagree with your idea that they had this preconception that Singapore was a former British colony as such they questioned my Chineseness. I doubt they were even aware that we were a former British colony because when I asked them what they knew about Singapore, all they could tell me was that our government is really strict and that our food is really delicious, especially pandan cake! I think it is really how Singapore portrays itself as a country. With Singapore being a multiracial country, English would be our common medium. However,my hosts were not aware that we have to study a second language in school and as such thought that I was only capable of understanding English.
Eunice: Thanks Eunice for sharing your experience in America. I have to say that I was also a little offended at first when the Taiwanese thought I was unable to comprehend Chinese but thinking after in some time on, I understand that if you were not living in Singapore or have studied our history, you wouldn't really understand our culture. I myself have learnt a great deal about the Taiwanese culture during my month long stay but there is still much more to learn about them so during my next trip there I hope to gain more experience living among the locals there.
Mabel: Yes, it really is important to understand different cultures more haha!
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